The Bentons had five sons (Jack, Elias, Mark, Lyle, and Chuck), but no daughters. Mrs. Benton had inherited well, and had good sense about her, but her property was entailed to be inherited by her nearest female relative after her death. Mr. Benton, fearing the poorhouse should he become a widower, concerned himself only with neighborhood gossip and the successful marrying off of his sons.
A young wealthy search-engine heiress, Charlotte Bing, had recently moved next door, so Mr Benton pressed upon Mrs Benton to seek her out and introduce her to their children. She did. Miss Bing had come with her two brothers, one married, and a quiet and brooding young aunt, Darcy Fitzwilliams. The Bentons were all invited over to the Bings' residence for a poetry slam. Another family, the Lukaters, was invited as well with their several children.
At the slam, they all met and greeted one another amiably, except Darcy Fitzwilliams who stood in a corner stuck to her cellphone. She stared and swiped with a serious expression.
"Come, Darcy," said Charlotte, "don't be such a bore. There are all these eligible young bachelors about! Talk, be merry!"
"I see no point in talking if I have nothing to say," groused Darcy. "What could there be about these young men that I could possibly be interested in?" she asked, looking pointedly at Elias. Elias overheard, and scowled.
Mr. Benton overheard as well, and was offended on behalf of his son. "That Darcy is haughty and sarcastic," he said to Mr. Lukater.
"Obviously so, but she's rich beyond imagination," agreed Mr Lukater. "She owns a genetics company, with a profitable data mining division to boot. The wealth has gone to her head."
"Charlotte seems to have taken an interest in my Jack, do you see that?" observed Mr. Benton.
"Of course she would, he's the handsomest man here by far," lamented Mr. Lukater. His lads did not seem to be faring so well. He should implore them to exert themselves more in the gymnasium. "Miss Darcy Fitzwilliams would be quite the catch, but she has eyes for nobody."
"Upon my word, it would be marvelous if one of my lads could become the future Mr. Bing or Mr. Fitzwilliams," said Mr. Benton. "There is no way up in this world for an educated but fortuneless man but through a marrying well."
"We came for poetry," announced Charlotte. "Who would like to go first? Jack, perhaps?"
There was boisterous encouragement, and attempts to elide the task at hand, but finally Jack agreed.Eli accompanied to the side as beat-box. Jack stood on the podium, surveyed his audience, and, flexing his muscles, prepared to speak.
"Old Motha Hubbard! She WentToThe Cupboard! To Get her poor Dog A Bone! But When she got There, the CupBoardWasBare! And So the poor Dog Had None!"
There were cheers and light applause. "The syncopation was an inventive ornamentation!" noted Mark. "And the triplet-timing of 'cupboard was' was quite effective."
"Why does poetry have to be mean to animals?" bemoaned their youngest brother Chunk.
"Perhaps you next, Elias?" suggested Mr. Bing, Charlotte's brother.
Elias jumped to the podium, laughing, gesturing with his hands and whole body as he spoke. "Perhaps I'll do Quasimoto ... no, the birdwatcher ... no here is one I've invented on the spot:
"When I wake, my head all drowsy, My eyes all blurred, my hair all blowsy, Necessities stretch the day ahead a mile! But when day is done, with setting sun, With aching legs the race is won, Ye gods! I've done it gangnam stile."
"That made no sense at all," observed Darcy Fitzwilliams. "You are a ham."
Elias rolled his eyes. He did his best pig imitation, starting with a snuffle and ending in a squeal, then jumped off the stage. She can't resist making fun of me, Elias brooded to himself.
Mark begged to go next. He wanted to recite the entirety of Wordsworth's 'Hiawatha'. But the remainder of the guests cast about for somewhere else to go, and Miss Bing declared the night was drawing long, so they called it an evening and everyone bid farewell.
Jack and Miss Bing texted each other that night, and the next morning Jack visited to walk with her through a nearby park. Darcy followed her friend, and Mr. Bing followed Darcy, so the four of them set off on foot along a wild trail.
Around noon, Jack called Mrs. Benton, informing her that his ancle had twisted. "You're brother's been hurt," said Mrs. Benton. "He's at the top of deadman's cliff, and Miss Bing has fetched servants to bring him down."
Elias was distraught, and took off on foot. The park was only a three mile run, so he caught up to the party in under half an hour. Jack and Charlotte were talking gaily, despite Jack's ancle being swollen like a child's purple balloon. "It's my trick ancle, dear Eli" said Jack, "It has buckled before while ice-skating."
"Don't put weight on it, we will carry you out," said Elias.
He and Mr. Bing formed a chair, and with Jack draped over their shoulders, they walked back down to the park entrance. Miss Fitzwilliams had called for a driver, and a black limousine carried them to the infirmary. Miss Bing insisted on accompanying Jack, as did Eli. Darcy came too ... she found herself intrigued by Eli's lively and animated character, despite his being far below her station. Mr. Bing followed as well.
< add conversation of Eli and Darcy snipping at each other while waiting for a doctor >
Dr. Jones took X-rays, she determined nothing serious was amiss, and advised him to treat it with ice and rest.
< Elias sees his projected future net worth has climbed from $10 thousand to $10 billion, and is amazed, it is a wonder, but he can make no sense of it. It certainly has nothing to do with that awful Darcy Fitzwilliams. >
This was in response to a prompt on reddit.com r/WritingPrompts, "The invention of a new algorithm, that uses big data, psychology and genetic statistics, provide in real time your personal value in US Dollars. The average is 10k. One day walking on the streets you fall in love with a random woman, the next day your value is 10^10". It is also very directly copied from Jane Austen's "Pride and Prejudice", but with the genders reversed, and with cell phones added.